Today I Learned something that may not make sense to some. This lesson was right for me and changed my perspective in a very needed time. I also picked up a trick or two on how to not take it personal if someone doesn't understand me. I will do my best to explain todays lesson and I hope it is taken with intent to understand.
What I learned today is how to not lose my mind! What a lesson right? I must be extra special to claim to know this long sought after secret to peace and joy in this life! Ooohh, aawww!
What is not a secret is what's going on in the world. I am probably one of the most "grey area" people in terms of my convictions. I can agree and see points of view from every corner of the room. I can respect opinions and discern truth from pretense with little to no feathers ruffled. And yet, this current issue in the media has weighed oh so heavy. I am sure you all have felt the universal blues of negativity sweep the collective attention of America the past few weeks. It is everywhere!!! I am not here to share my personal opinion on that. What I want to share today is how I went from visibly effected by it all and struggling in my relationship to connect, to then feeling relieved and joyful again with one epiphany.
This meme on facebook:
If this doesn't put a smile on your face, you must not be alive or you never heard the phrase "Going to Hell in a Hand Basket."
This should be funny to anyone right now of almost any age, any background, any geographical indifference or stand in opinion and here is why:
WE ARE ALL JUST ALONG FOR THE RIDE! (I don't mean the ride to hell in said hand basket, but the ride of life.)
I know we all want to feel like we can move mountains, and we can in regards to our own lives and our own success but you guys, it is not our place nor even a possibility to change anyone. We have no power or responsibility to convince anyone one way or another. Think about how small you are in the existence of human life, in the grandest measure of the universe. (I mean for this to sound hopeful so if you are feeling extra sensitive about your impact here, keep reading! You need this the most!)
Consider the true influence you have and how anxiety, anger and resentment serves NO ONE! What we should do is realize our humble reality that we aren't special enough to "Change the World." There! I said it! You can Change YOUR World with focus on change within you and that is all. Once we accept that, then we can find peace with what is happening out there within ourselves! I for one am still confused about responding to unfair violence with unfair violence but here is my response to that response: The reactions of others is their choice and if I am dwelling on things I cannot control, they aren't changed and I am left suffering. No progress there.
Through time and through many many eras of the world, humankind has been at war. We have disagreed since day one and every day since. That is just the freedom of thought and speech and physical ability of over 108 billion humans to be born since the beginning. We were made to think and act for ourselves by design. Is it all daisies? Of course not! People can get ugly! People are reactive to the things around them. It is not always positive or constructive but that is just the way it is and will forever be. In a way, we are always headed toward "Hell in a Hand Basket," if you choose to perceive it that way. If you let yourself get wrapped up in the things that feed the fear it seems that you will feel you have a permanent seat in that hell ridden hand basket.
The culture of society, as a whole, is flawed in thinking that we need to all believe the same way and act the same way and wrap up our paradigms from life experiences into one package. Then we all need to deliver that package one certain way. That will never happen. Period. It is one of the deepest truths of existence. There will always be this dichotomy on the earth.
This truth is nothing to feel sad about though! This is a truth that should set you free! This realization has sat very well with me because now I get to move forward. I don't have to be a slave to the things that are really out of my realm of control, again, by design.
I am not saying you have no control over anything in life. Once you release the need to control your community, your friends on facebook, the outrageous behavior of strangers in the news - that is when you get your power back. You get to control you at that point! You get to decide what you will and will not consume for you! You are not beholden to anyone to do or say anything that does not serve your higher purpose. I know I sound preachy and I only mean this bluntly to stand out in your mind! I talk to myself in this firm voice quite often so the message will set in, for good! If you don't get exclusive about where your energy goes, you are doing yourself a disservice.
So I had a chuckle about the perceived hand basket (because come on, it's so clever) and I removed myself from the social pressures two days ago. The tension in my home and in my heart released. For days I was on edge. I was way too consumed by instagram and the unsettling news clips. I chose not to comment my opinion online more that I did comment. (Still guilty of a few "Hear, Hears" to some things I agreed with.)
** Side Note**
Go Figure, those comments only brought more animosity from STRANGERS! I let some people I didn't know call me "sis" and a "disgusting person" all in the same response to me liking a simple post. How is that moving the needle toward love? My head was on fire with anger and annoyance. I chose not to indulge further as my personal opinions aren't up for debate. I was being talked to as if I haven't done my own research, as if I haven't asked myself truly, what is right and wrong here and how do I feel deep down. I am a good person and I know my actions toward others reflect that. So for me to feel the need to have a Facebook fight with a literal stranger did not feel like a productive response. Yes, I was steaming!
I was also tired of not having my usual happy self around anymore. That was when I changed my approach to this mindset. I gave myself permission to feel validated in my opinions regardless of the push back. I turned off my phone and I spent some face to face, uninterrupted time with the man that brings me true joy. We laughed and got deep and connected and I was reminded how much MY real life deserves my attention.
I like to imagine if I lived in the mountains, with no internet or cell service, I wouldn't have a clue as to what hideousness is going on. Some may say my lack of desire to make noise and speak out is selfish and ignorant. Here is what I have to say to that, "sis"...
I am not God. I am not here to "make noise" that contributes to negativity disguised as positivity. It is not my job to try and save people from themselves.
I want to make it clear that I am all about helping those in need, those who want to change, those who want to be educated or enlightened. I want to make a career out of healing others but I will not sacrifice my progress in life to appeal to the masses with essentially no true change from it. If I am robbed of my happiness today over a video clip online of someone who is obviously deep within their own belief, then that loss of joy is on me and me alone.
The main reason the photo above made such a difference for me is because the humor is a welcome relief in this time and even though it is hilarious, there was something deeper behind it for me.
The more profound meaning is in the truth that this world will keep turning through the tragedy. We will live on and move from media scandal to media scandal for the rest of our lives. Is the world coming to an end? No one knows! That is why we need to make the most of our personal sovereign existence.
If we expect people and media and the world to be a certain way it most likely will not be what we think we signed up for. It cannot meet your expectations. So if the world is ending and you were promised a hand basket experience, well then, you have to create your own!
Maybe this lesson seems cold and as if I don't care for change and it's every man for himself. Well let me clear that up and say I absolutely do care about change! However, the whole world can't change, at least not while we are focusing on everything but our own power. Truth is, it is every man for himself in regards to what we can control.
I feel liberated and empowered by my clear understanding of my role and my place in this crazy world. I am not special. I will not be the one that moves social and economical mountains but I can move the mountains in my life that mean something to me and build a legacy true to me. That is my goal! That is where we can find happiness.
I also know this was not as heart warming on the surface but I would challenge you to unplug, release your urge to control external factors and find that control within. You can create the world peace you desire in your world and decide what legacy you want to leave behind.
Again, thank you for being here. I appreciate all my readers and support they give.
Love and Light!